And the women tug their hair
Like they’re trying to prove it won’t fall out
And all the men are gargoyles
Dipped long in Irish stout

The whole place is pickled
The people are pickles for sure
And no-one knows if they’ve done more here
Than they ever would do in a jar

This could be Rotterdam or anywhere
Liverpool or Rome
’cause Rotterdam is anywhere
Anywhere alone
Anywhere alone

Oh, and that fabulous song LDN by Lily Allen totally sums up my love/hate experiences living (and cycling about) in London. Plus it’s silly, too right on, and probably applies to any big, crazy city. Smile at the wrong person just to be nice, and you’re in for trouble!

Riding through the city on my bike all day
Cause the filth took away my licence
It doesn’t get me down and I feel ok
Cause the sights that I’m seeing are priceless

Everything seems to look as it should
But I wonder what goes on behind doors
A fella looking dapper, but he’s sittin with a slapper
Then I see it’s a pimp and his crack whore

You might laugh you might frown
Walkin’ round London town

Sun is in the sky oh why oh why ?
Would I wanna be anywhere else

When you look with your eyes
Everything seems nice
But if you look twice
you can see it’s all lies

There was a little old lady, who was walkin down the road
She was struggling with bags from Tesco
There were people from the city havin lunch in the park
I believe that it’s called al fresco.
Then a kid came along to offer a hand

But before she had time to accept it
hits her over the head, doesn’t care if she’s dead
Cause he’s got all her jewellery and wallet

Life, that’s city life, yeah that’s city life, that’s city life

Um, yeah. Time to stop slacking. Thanks for the lovely brain break.